Whatever floats your FLOAT!

So I went to the mountains this weekend to visit my parents and celebrate my nephew's first birthday!! (Yippee Henry!!). But, in the process, Heather, Robbie, my mom and I decide to go "tubing". For those of you who aren't from the mountains, this means that we were riding intertubes (like from tractor tires) down the river. The water levels are still down, so we couldn't go too far without getting stuck. We would have to dismount our floats and walk back upstream to deeper water to go down again. The water was quite chilly, but it was actually a very nice day to be floating. I've been around this river almost all my life, and I know there are some deep places and some places that over the years have just been "scarry" to me, so I don't tread in these areas. For instance, the other three trudged several yards farther than me upstream because I am, literally, afraid to go any farther, even though I see them and they are obviously head above water.

My mom had surgery on her ankles a few years ago and that was causing her to have trouble this dismount and resume mess. She doesn't have much strength in her legs due to all the atrophy after the surgery. What made it interesting was that Heather and I decided to tug her in her tube back upstream so that she could come back down with us. Otherwise, she would have had to have stopped "playing" with us. While we were pulling her, we were joking around and I said, "Whatever floats your float." We all just laughed. But, it got me to thinking. Pulling mom was no big deal. It was really no burden at all. The deeper the water got, the easier it got. And, believe it or not, I walked all the way to where they were before (the scarry place) to come back down again. I wasn't so afraid when I was pulling someone else.

It's the same with our fellowship and girlfriends. If you venture out alone in the river, you may find a place where you just don't want to go any farther because you are afraid of what lies ahead. But, when you are connected to those around you, they can help pull you through and even make the times when you are in "deep trouble" easier. In the process of helping each other, you'll learn more about yourself than you've ever known and go to places you never thought you'd reach because you're not scared anymore. They are there with you. (In a much deeper metaphor, this could be applied to the Trinity, but that's another depth for another day). Hope next time I'm in a float, I have my friends and family to help me along!!

wounded, anyone?

Robbie and I went to church this morning. We wanted to try out a new contemporary service at a more traditional church in our town. By a series of events, we got there late, which meant we actually missed the "contemporary" worship that I had really wanted to hear. But, I told myself, if Robbie got up and came with me, what did I have to complain about. We were in church, before 9a.m., together. So, the service proceeds with a fill-in pastor. (The normal pastor had a family emergency). The sermon is from the story of Peter's reinstatement as an apostle/disciple. It's a decent sermon, but it's not the subject of this blog. The subject at hand is a side comment he made about, "Peter, the head of the church, wounding a soldier". The thoughts started reeling and that brings me here to get them out of my mind and out there for the blog.

The text in question is Luke 22: 47-51

While he was still speaking a crowd came up, and the man who was called
Judas, one of the Twelve, was leading them. He approached Jesus to kiss him, but
Jesus asked him, "Judas, are you betraying the Son of Man with a
kiss?" When Jesus' followers saw what was going to happen, they said,
"Lord, should we strike with our swords?" And one of them struck the servant of
the high priest, cutting off his right ear. But Jesus answered, "No more of
this!" And he touched the man's ear and healed him.

Here we have Jesus, the human form of God. Peter, a disciple, soon to be trusted teacher and head of the early "church". A guardsman, a non-believer, a Roman soldier. So, Peter, the "trusted teacher" injures the guardsman when he comes to arrest Christ in the Garden of Gethsemane. How does he injure him, he cuts off his ear? His ear? Seriously, not an arm or a leg or a stab through the gut or chest, but he cuts off an ear. God has an interesting sense of humor. Even this one made me grin because EVERYTHING, even the small detail or ear vs. arm is important. Why? Because you can follow Christ/God with no legs, no arms, no fingers or toes. None of us can physically see him, so we'd all be in the same boat if we had no eyes, but how can you follow if you can't hear the directions???

Have you ever seen a time in your own life (or been witness to a time) when a trusted leader or confidant injured a non-believer or even a new Christian. They may have been judgemental or hurtful or prideful towards someone. Made the other person seem "small" or insignificant, unworthy of fellowship. It even happens with "seasoned" Christians. Someone insults us without even realizing it. They come across as "high and mighty" (in the mountains they call this "Holier than thou") and this makes us feel guilty or not good enough. What they did not realize was that these injuries cut off the ears of the people they hurt. If they were truly trying to share the love expressed in God's word, the bible, then they sure made the words hard to hear. How can these people grow their faith or develop a relationship with God when they can't hear the words being spoken to them. They can read their word, but they can not hear guidance because they have been rendered spiritually deaf. The harsh words or criticisms have taken the means of amplification from the ear canal. Even if God's word reaches them, it is a dull ringing compared to the hurt of having their ear cut off which is likely loud and clear! It creates a serious stumbling stone. But, notice in the story that it does not end with Peter cutting the guard's ear off. Praise God, it goes on to say that Jesus saw the insult and healed the wound. He touched the man's ear and healed him. That man, I'm sure, never looked at Jesus the same way again. No longer in his eyes was he an impostor, but rather he was the Healer. The King of Kings. I AM.

If you are out there today and you have been maimed in a "religious" experience (something said or done in the name of God or by someone representing God), please know that God loves you and desires a relationship with YOU, just as you are. Just as he told Peter and the disciples in the Garden, "There will be no more of this." Ask him to heal you and help you to hear. He will help you to overcome that injury and become whole again and find your way to him. For the rest of us, we need to be mindful of the spiritually deaf, as well as mindful of any deafness or other maimings that we may produce. And here we are again, back to choices....

you MADE me do it...

So, once again, I have another song lyric analogy. While I was scrubbing our bathroom as if my life depended on it today (my in-laws are coming over for dinner tomorrow), I was listening to a music channel. So, here it is, Mylie Cyrus.... 7 Things I Hate About You. The line in question? "And the 7th thing I hate the most that you do, You make me love you...". Interesting.... There are many of us out here running around, hurt, because we believe, deep deep down, that someone made us hurt, made us get in trouble, made us have a bad day. Did they really? seriously? You know what they really did? They (whomever you are blaming) made a bad choice. And what did you do about it? You made your choice to blame them. There are a LOT of choices to be made in life. But the nitty gritty of it is not only the choices you make, but how you handle the choices that others make as they intertwine in your life. Maybe it's time to open a new door and see the other side. I'm sure there's more to say, but it's been a long day and that's all I got for now.

keep bleeding, keep keep bleeding love

Love. Complicated? You bet. It took me almost 30 years to figure out what love is and even now it is easily confused with other things. Watching TV/movies and listening to the radio, it's no wonder it only gets more confusing daily. We don't have good "examples" of love at home or in the media. We look for love in "all the wrong places". We hope that by having sex with someone we will hold on to their love. Have you heard the song that says, "I kissed a girl and I liked it..."? What a mess. God created love and his love is so much more than that. I took time to really do an indepth Bible search of love one time. I was surprised at what I found out. Love was totally not an emotion. It was, however, an action, a couple of them actually. Want to know what they were? Here you go: Forgiveness and Obedience. When God forgave me all my sins, it was his complete and total act of unconditional love for me. When I give all of myself to my Father (heavenly father/God) in obedience to his will/ways, then I gain knowledge of what love is and it spills over into my daily life. I can't stop it, it just does because I'm so full of that joy. The books of 1-3 John really lay that out well if you wanna read if it for yourself.


There is a song on the radio now (secular, you really can find God at work everywhere), that almost captivates me every time I hear it. I must be a song inspired by God and not just by lust. It very much reminds me of where I once was and how much I've grown. I have never been a "perfect" Christian and I know I never will be. I walked around for YEARS holding other people at arms length because I was afraid of getting hurt. I think I must have missed out on the real love and friendship of so many wonderful people. God came into my heart. He opened the parts that I had been holding shut. He showed me what love is and where to find it. He set my heart free to love. I don't know if Leona meant for her song to read/sound like a testimony, but it does. Here are the lyrics to this song:

Leona Lewis, "Keep Bleeding Love"
Closed off from love I didn't need the pain,
Once or twice was enough And it was all in vain,
Time starts to pass Before you know it you're frozen.
But something happened For the very first time with you ,
My heart melted into the ground Found something true
And everyone's looking round Thinking I'm going crazy

But I don't care what they say I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away But they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein That I keep on closing You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love I keep bleeding I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open

Trying hard not to hear But they talk so loud
Their piercing sounds fill my ears Try to fill me with doubt
Yet I know that the goal Is to keep me from falling
But nothing's greater Than the rush that comes with your embrace
And in this world of loneliness I see your face
Yet everyone around me Thinks that I'm going crazy, maybe, maybe

But I don't care what they say I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away But they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein That I keep on closing, You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love I keep bleeding I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love You cut me open

And it's draining all of me, Oh they find it hard to believe
I'll be wearing these scars For everyone to see
I don't care what they say I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away But they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein That I keep on closing, You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love I keep bleeding I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding Keep, keep bleeding love

that is SO not hot!

My husband and I are 30... and man do we feel old sometimes. We recently went out to Ham's here in town on a Friday night to catch up with some old friends. It was 9:30 p.m. when we got there. Not all that late. We are there no more than 30 minutes before we are subjected to watching two girls dancing seductively together and, yep, you guessed it, kissing! KISSING! There was no band. There was alcohol (it's Ham's). There was no dancefloor! We were sitting outside at picnic tables and there they were between 2 tables. (And they were doing this while glancing over at any man who would make eye contact with them.)

Interestingly enough, everyone in my group was married... and we never had to do anything like that to find a husband. So, why did these 2 girls feel they needed to go to such lengths? I felt disgusted. I felt old/out of the loop, but then I also felt miserable for these girls. Why? I kept asking myself. What happened to make them think that is a normal way to get a guy? Are they trying to make someone else hot? are they trying to make each other hot? I mean, what's the deal? Then, I was browsing TV while googling (a multitasker) on Saturday and came across a thing on VH1 or MTV talking about the 100 hottest people. Two different shows. One on the hottest people of the 90's and the other was Maxim's Top 100 hottest something. BOTH of these programs made blatent commments.... 2 women kissing is sexy. Lesbian overtones are sexy....blah blah blah.

I'm just here to say that I am (albeit overweight) a happy, successful and MARRIED woman who NEVER had to attract a man through these acts. That is not even how God created us to be. If you want to feel wanted and appreciated, you have to learn who you are through God's eyes. What you are looking for is LOVE, NOT LUST and you will come up empty handed and unsatisfied. (In case you haven't already learned this, sex is not intimacy and it is definitely not relationship. And, contrary to popular belief, you can live without sex). The Bible is full of countless encouragements that we are LOVED, wanted, accepted children of God. We are part of a family. We are part of a loving relationship with a man, with God. He can show us what love is, so maybe we can emulate that here on earth.

For all you single ladies out there, don't worry about finding a husband. There is a plan and purpose for that and God will drop it flat in your lap. I wasn't looking for Robbie. I didn't disrespect myself when we met/dated. I was a strong woman, focused on God. This attracted him to me. I didn't wear clothing that revealed my butt cheeks or my milk shake :) I didn't have a filthy mouth. We talked about grown up issues, family, school, career ideas and ventures. We came to love each other and here we are! Here is an encouraging word:

Luke 12: 22-31
Then Jesus said to his disciples: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?
"Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. 31But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.

I'll let you apply this one to your life on your own, but let me say this. If God cares enough to sustain you (food, clothing, shelter) then he cares enough to provide a suitable mate for you. You are WORTH something to him, and he is Love so you could feel WORTHY of love. No matter where you've been, what you've done, what you have plans to do tonight. Establish a relationship with God, ask him to forgive your past and show you how to proceed with your future.

come and listen...

People make God out to be so "high and mighty". Yes, he is an infinite omniscient, omnipotent being, but he really longs to be part of us, just one of the crowd in a way. That's why he is a 3-fold personality. He is GOD. He is the Holy Spirit (the guide that lives within us). He is Christ. He sent a part of himself to us as Jesus Christ, fully man and fully God. It was his way of showing us we could be human and live for God at the same time. Jesus was an ordinary man, a carpenter. He lived, he breathed, he bled. He wasn't the CEO of a large corporation, the Chief of State, the President or a King of a large country.He wasn't above the reproach of the law and didn't evade his taxes. He was a working guy. Trying to make it, just like the rest of us, setting an example of how God wanted us to carry ourselves and present ourselves. So, what then, does he want with us? RELATIONSHIP! He wants to be included, give advice, listen, hang out, sing with you in the car (good or bad), hug you close in bad times and rejoice with you in good times. But in order to get intimate with God, you have to know who he is and what he is all about. The Bible lays that out for us and I could talk all day on that subject alone, but I feel that this is the scripture for today and it says more than enough. We all have to start somewhere....

Isaiah 55
1 Come, all you who are thirsty,
come to the waters;
and you who have no money,
come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk
without money and without cost.
2 Why spend money on what is not bread,
and your labor on what does not satisfy?
Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good,
and your soul will delight in the richest of fare.

3 Give ear and come to me;
hear me, that your soul may live.
I will make an everlasting covenant with you...

6 Seek the LORD while he may be found;
call on him while he is near.

7 Let the wicked forsake his way
and the evil man his thoughts.
Let him turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on him,
and to our God, for he will freely pardon.

8 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,"
declares the LORD.

9 "As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.

10 As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,

11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

12 You will go out in joy
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
will clap their hands.

13 Instead of the thornbush will grow the pine tree,
and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the LORD's renown,
for an everlasting sign,
which will not be destroyed."

God created you for a purpose... he did not create you in vain. Seek a relationship with him and he will begin to show you where to go. No matter where you have been... good, bad, or ugly, he can and will use you in his kingdom.

do unto others

Welcome to the first blog of a new blog spot. I've been a blogger for a while with my personal site for keeping my family posted on us, but I've had an epiphany and I want to see what comes of it. What brought on the epiphany? "The Whole Ten Yards". If you've never seen it, I totally recommend both The Whole Nine Yards and The Whole Ten Yards watched in succession. Sure, there is some language and some nudity, but it's still funny.

Bruce Willis' character is so funny in the second one. He's a contract killer who is having a mid-life crisis. He somehow has always had a warped sense of "morality". In the process, he tells another character, "Oz, do unto others or you'll turn into a pillar of salt!" Now, at this, I'm laughing inside and out, LOUDLY! But then it got me thinking. There are so many people out there who are searching, who want to know but don't know what they are looking for. Who think that if you don't do unto others, you'll turn into a pillar of salt because they don't know the love of a savior.

What has kept them from this love? Is it generational? Parents and/or grandparents who were isolated from God by religious tradition and personal piety, hypocrisy? Is it rebellion? Choosing to do as they please. Is it pride or self-worship? "I can make it on my own, there is no God." Is is tolerance? Everything is "okay" or can be "justified", why do we need God? Is it pure ignorance? They've truly never heard the Word of God and had no way of knowing what is out there.

So, I've decided to blog. What in the world can come of a blog? Well, Lord only knows. I hope that I can be used to write interesting blogs that illuminate some Truth. Am I perfect, heck no! Am I a minister? Heck no!! But, I am a member of the kingdom of God and since I have been saved by grace, I owe God, big time. So, here goes.

Father, I trust you that your word will not return to you void/empty. You will use these words as you desire, to fulfill your purpose. Thank you for an opportunity to share your love with others. Amen (so be it).