that is SO not hot!

My husband and I are 30... and man do we feel old sometimes. We recently went out to Ham's here in town on a Friday night to catch up with some old friends. It was 9:30 p.m. when we got there. Not all that late. We are there no more than 30 minutes before we are subjected to watching two girls dancing seductively together and, yep, you guessed it, kissing! KISSING! There was no band. There was alcohol (it's Ham's). There was no dancefloor! We were sitting outside at picnic tables and there they were between 2 tables. (And they were doing this while glancing over at any man who would make eye contact with them.)

Interestingly enough, everyone in my group was married... and we never had to do anything like that to find a husband. So, why did these 2 girls feel they needed to go to such lengths? I felt disgusted. I felt old/out of the loop, but then I also felt miserable for these girls. Why? I kept asking myself. What happened to make them think that is a normal way to get a guy? Are they trying to make someone else hot? are they trying to make each other hot? I mean, what's the deal? Then, I was browsing TV while googling (a multitasker) on Saturday and came across a thing on VH1 or MTV talking about the 100 hottest people. Two different shows. One on the hottest people of the 90's and the other was Maxim's Top 100 hottest something. BOTH of these programs made blatent commments.... 2 women kissing is sexy. Lesbian overtones are sexy....blah blah blah.

I'm just here to say that I am (albeit overweight) a happy, successful and MARRIED woman who NEVER had to attract a man through these acts. That is not even how God created us to be. If you want to feel wanted and appreciated, you have to learn who you are through God's eyes. What you are looking for is LOVE, NOT LUST and you will come up empty handed and unsatisfied. (In case you haven't already learned this, sex is not intimacy and it is definitely not relationship. And, contrary to popular belief, you can live without sex). The Bible is full of countless encouragements that we are LOVED, wanted, accepted children of God. We are part of a family. We are part of a loving relationship with a man, with God. He can show us what love is, so maybe we can emulate that here on earth.

For all you single ladies out there, don't worry about finding a husband. There is a plan and purpose for that and God will drop it flat in your lap. I wasn't looking for Robbie. I didn't disrespect myself when we met/dated. I was a strong woman, focused on God. This attracted him to me. I didn't wear clothing that revealed my butt cheeks or my milk shake :) I didn't have a filthy mouth. We talked about grown up issues, family, school, career ideas and ventures. We came to love each other and here we are! Here is an encouraging word:

Luke 12: 22-31
Then Jesus said to his disciples: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?
"Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. 31But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.

I'll let you apply this one to your life on your own, but let me say this. If God cares enough to sustain you (food, clothing, shelter) then he cares enough to provide a suitable mate for you. You are WORTH something to him, and he is Love so you could feel WORTHY of love. No matter where you've been, what you've done, what you have plans to do tonight. Establish a relationship with God, ask him to forgive your past and show you how to proceed with your future.